I started writing this post on Monday. Then things got crazy. Being a grown-up is hard.
I realized that lately I have done a lot of physical activity, fitness, and nutrition-related posts. When I say “a lot” I mean that in relation to my blog, which has very little posts compared to my
blidols. Blidols is my first attempt at combining Blog and Idol. It creeps me out, so you will probably never hear it again. Striking now. Maybe I can go with bloggols instead. We will revisit this point in the interim.
BACK TO THE MAIN EVENT. My blog’s name is “secretlifecoach,” yet I feel that I don’t address the life coaching aspect of this blog enough. It’s so much easier to delve into fitness/nutrition-related events, for me at least. I decided that I want to address one life coaching topic a week (if not more). Yes, yes, I know. Technically, fitness and nutrition are part of life and thus can be considered life coaching. You are right. I am referring more to the ‘mind & body, soul-searching’ type of topics. But first–today’s irrelevant gif, below.
TODAY’S LIFE COACHING TOPIC
(darn, I should have a graphic for this.)
No matter what you call it, you’re probably guilty of it. It’s in our nature. Some, more than others, but I find it hard to believe that there is a person in this world who hasn’t over-analyzed at least one thought in the span of his or her lifetime. Speak up if you’re out there. Stand up, Real Slim Shady.
1. What is Over-analyzing (just in case you think you don’t do it, I will prove it to you here):
Taking a single thought or situation and turning it into one or more completely falsified stories and then having a reaction to the story rather than the facts.
Let me give you some examples:
Situation: Your boyfriend didn’t text you.
Falsified Story: He finally decided he couldn’t stand the way you brush your teeth, and he has fallen in love with his co-worker instead. He hasn’t had the heart to break it to you yet, so he is just avoiding you. He is currently riding a swan boat through the love tunnel with the love-of-his-life co-worker.
The More Likely Situation/The Truth: He is either either sleeping, eating, working, left his phone at home, etc.
Situation: Your boss praised your co-worker during the weekly company-wide meeting.
Falsified Story: Your boss thinks your co-worker is more competent than you. Thus, your co-worker is probably going to get promoted next week and you will forever remain in your lowly entry-level position.
The More Likely Situation/The Truth: Your boss is just not a consistent ‘praiser’ and just coincidentally decided to be in touch with the world when your co-worker was doing something special.
2. Why do we Overanalyze?
- Because we have too much time! Slightly joking, but in all seriousness, if we occupied ourselves with more productive activities, our minds theoretically wouldn’t have so much time to wander, ponder, and over-analyze.
- Because we are insecure. In relation to the two situations above: you are either insecure in your relationship with your boyfriend or insecure in your performance at your job and seek validation from your boss. Everyone has insecurities, so please do not take this bullet point as me bashing those of you who ever feel insecure about anything. It is, unfortunately, human nature. It could even be in a dog’s nature as well. You never know!
3. How do we stop over-analyzing? Below are some suggestions:
- Thought-stopping: change negative, worrisome thoughts into positive ones. Stop the thought. For instance, if you start to think “Gosh, do I really look like THAT in these pants,” recognize that as a negative thought and stop it by saying something more along the lines of “I look great in these pants and furthermore, I am having a great hair day,” or just stop looking in the mirror.
- Busy yourself with somethings else. If you are just sitting around worrying about something, it’s time to do something else. Read a book, write in a journal, grab coffee with a friend–anything that can distract your mind from that thought.
- Give yourself a 5-minute time period designated for dwelling. When that 5 minute time period is over, stop. Cut it off. Go cold turkey.
- Brainstorm solutions to your over-analyzed thought by writing down actions you can take to solve it or at least mollify it.
- Keep repeating rational thoughts in your head to counteract the thoughts that plague your mind. If you think “I don’t think this person likes me,” answer back “That’s ridiculous, I gave them no reason to dislike me. If they dislike me for something little or nothing at all, not my problem. I have so many great people in my life.”
More later, cheers! Here’s to not over-analyzing. And Happy Friday to me! (I took of work tomorrow so this week, Thursday is my Friday. Hooray!)